I'm sad in a profound way. I don't know, its kinda like a fushion of melancholy and a somewhat cynic form of happiness. I'll probably laugh, and in the same time feel tears flowing..

Its really upsetting, when you realise you really like someone, can't seem to find a reason why, and then finding out its entirely impossible between the both of you. Top it off with the fact that she treats you really nice, but only as a friend.

I really feel like laughing at myself now, for being such an idiot, for trying when I know deep down inside that it's no longer possible. When I ask you about the type of guys you'd like and find out in dismay that I'm no where near what you're looking for, when I hear you say in such an off hand manner that we're can't possibly be together, I really am torn apart.

But being me, the shield called humoris held in front of me yet again, and I lead you to believe I'm not as affected as I truely am..